How to Live with Someone Without Driving Them Crazy
After you’ve dated someone for a significant length of time, moving in together is often the natural next step. Living with your partner can be exciting and a positive change for your relationship. However, it can also be a stressful event. There are many things to figure out before the actual move-in date, such as where in Toronto you’re going to start your new life.
Here are some helpful tips to keep top of mind before moving in together. Take the plunge without driving your significant other crazy, courtesy of Susan Macarz:
Figure Out Your Finances
One myth we must dispel from the get-go is that both parties should split the rent right down the middle. Unless you both make the same salary and both have the exact same amount of debt, deciding to go Dutch on rent and expenses is going to leave one of you broke and maybe even a bit resentful.
As a couple, you should make sure to have an honest conversation about your finances, even if the subject is a little uncomfortable. One of the things you should tackle head-on is how much each of you can comfortably afford.
This may not be the same number, and you should be okay with that.
Find a Place You Both Like
Maybe your next step is a big house, or maybe it’s just an apartment in a convenient location from work or school. Whatever the case, the key is to live somewhere you both can enjoy in equal measure. Make sure to take into consideration your partner’s preferences, and don’t forget to effectively communicate yours.
Once you’ve reviewed each other’s finances, looked at Toronto’s market for appropriate pricing, and decided on a budget, have fun cruising through the neighbourhoods and researching online.
Consider the following aspects, all of which are important:
- The type of home: Do you want to start with an apartment and expand later, or do you want to start with an abundance of space and grow into it? Windfields has both condo townhouses on Leslie Street and new residential homes from which to choose.
- The commute: Midtown Toronto has wealthy neighbourhoods, like the Bridle Path, that are hidden or heavily residential, requiring luxury homeowners to have a car or two. By contrast, Downtown provides easy access for homeowners to walk to work and enjoy the Harbourfront during lunch-time breaks
- The amenities: How close do you want to be to the city’s hustle and bustle? Liberty Village is popular with working men and women since it’s quiet while offering new condo owners proximity to nightlife entertainment and everyday needs, such as pharmacies and grocery stores.
- The educational offerings: If you’re planning to have children, you’ll want to be situated near good schools for different levels. Take the Banbury and Don Mills neighbourhood, for instance. You have options that facilitate your child’s learning from preschool to college.
- Cannabis Restraints: Bone up on the Cannabis Act, so you can find a new home that allows you or your partner to live peacefully with the neighbours.
Don’t Build Furniture Together
It’s a running joke that the fastest way to divorce or breakup is to build IKEA furniture together.
This isn’t necessarily true, but it definitely can frustrate you, which—in the heat of the moment—you may take out on the other person. Assembling your bed or dresser by yourself is bad enough, but when you add someone who thinks they can do it better than you into the mix, you’re gearing yourself up for a round of name-calling, passive aggressive mutterings, and downright shouting.
Consider hiring a service that puts the furniture together for you.
Give Each Other Space
Spending quality time together is awesome. It bolsters your connection, re-establishes deeper feelings, and reminds you why you’re together. But there comes a time in every person’s life when they just need their own personal space, regardless if they’re in a relationship.
When you first move in with someone, you may notice that you have less alone time than you’d like. Make it a point of leaving the house on your own from time to time to take part in the single activities you enjoy. Otherwise, cabin fever may set in and drive both of you nuts.
Don’t Make the Décor One-Sided
Deciding how your home is going to look may be a difficult task, especially if you both have different styles. Be prepared to make concessions for their personal taste, and don’t veto their proposed changes right off the bat. Creating a balance of your two styles will require a little elbow grease and smart thinking.
Here are some ideas:
- Your two styles might go better together if you change the colour palette from bold to neutral colours.
- Instead of letting the floral patterns and designs consume the room, settle for subtle hints with knick knacks, one or two accent pillows and small prints.
- You don’t have to spend excessively to make everything look brand new. You also don’t have to live with old and damaged items. By adding quality rugs to your décor style, you can have new vintage items that lend the room some character.
- Who knew metal and wood worked so well? The industrial farmhouse is trending, and the new décor style you and your partner create will fall into a subcategory without a doubt. Reclaiming items helps the environment and your wallet, so go ahead and fix up that old wood dining table and pair it with your partner’s metal chairs.
Living in harmony with someone is all about compromise and balance. There has to be a give and take with everything you both decide.
Make Decisions About Pets Together
Your other half may not be the only person with whom you’ll be living. If he or she is a pet owner, that means that pretty soon, you will be one, too.
Whether you already have one or plan to get one, it’s important to be clear about how life is going to be around pets. Chances are, your partner may already be friendly enough with your pet, but it is still important to discuss the finer details that your partner may not know.
Having a pet will affect your Toronto house hunting, so look for apartments that permit your type of pet, and survey the surrounding area for greenspaces.
Hire an Experienced Real Estate Broker
Her knowledge of homes and interior design will provide you and your partner with the insight you need. She knows that the buying experience, especially for first-time homeowners, is difficult. Start your search today, or get in touch with Susan now!